A Labor Story : Concluding part

Monday, 18th Dec 2006 5:30 p.m. - Intestines popping out

With the tablet not giving the desired outcome, I was induced drips and within minutes a throbbing pain developed that just increased in intensity. It would be there for 5 minutes and then go away.

Just when the Doc was about to leave the room, there was a huge commotion and suddenly I see the doors opening and a few men coming up the stairs carrying a huge person in a stretcher. The person on the stretcher, a lady in her mid 50s, was transferred to a operating table, helped out of her dress into the dressing gown (all this happening in front of our eyes). Just then I caught the mess she had become .. something near her stomach was popping out....you wouldn't want a description of that. I learnt later she was operated 15 days back and her uterus removed. She had apparently not adhered to the Doc's safety measures due to which the stitches had given away and she brought in. Another surgeon from across town was summoned.

With all the resources now attending to this emergency, I was left alone and at times the janitor was asked to sit by my side who would shout all the time. I retrospect, this is the only regret I have in this whole labor process. I wish nurses in hospitals spoke nicely to patients. When you are in so much pain, the least you can expect is some comforting words. Hospitals are so commercialised now that no one cares about service or whether you are alive/dead..its money all the way. In a country like India with a population of 1 billion plus, life of cattle is more dear than human life.

Continue reading A Labor Story


Monday, 18th Dec 2006 5:45 p.m. - I'm hungry, thirsty
I think I'm going to pass out in the pain. I cannot compare the pain to anything else because I have never experienced something of that intensity before.

I'm hungry.

I'm thirsty.

I feel like urinating.

I feel like pooping.

I can feel the contractions.

I feel like dying........

I am scared.

I am screaming in pain now.

I feel like seeing mom.

CNG : "Would you like orange juice?"

Myself: "Hell, yes."

She is called into the operating room for that intestine lady. And my juice is forgotten. There is no one attending to me. I can hardly speak. I muster some energy and motion my hand towards a passing human being and request for some water. Water comes a good 10 mins late. I also request to send mom in. The request is denied flatly.

Monday, 18th Dec 2006 6:00 p.m. - I become an exhibit now. That damn word "strain".
Thank god, someone thought this screaming girl needs some help. The Cynical Nurse who is an administrator in the hospital and has no clues about giving birth to babies comes in and sits on my bed. She is accompanied by the janitor and an anonymous nurse. All of them yell at me to get froggy and not "waste the pain".

"Strain, strain", they scream.

Assuming they meant push, I lift my legs, hold it tight with my hands and push hard. They are disappointed.

"You are not trying hard. All that's coming out is only blood."

I'm lying in a pool of blood.

Taking deep breaths, in my next contraction, I push hard. They are excited now. One anonymous nurse says, "See there is the head now". She places the doppler and says the baby's head is fixed and I got to try real hard now.

Monday, 18th Dec 2006 6:30 p.m. - Listen to my advice : Respect your mother and Don't make a baby

The interval between contractions had decreased. The pain down there was like this huge thing trying to gush out through a opening with the same rhythm as ocean waves would lash the shore and recede. Now imagine this happening every 5 minutes.

Two thoughts occurred to me that minute. The respect for my mother grew a zillion times for living through so much pain. I regretted for giving so much grief for mom. Don't ever hurt your moms, give them all the happiness you can. The pain they went through to give birth to you is something that words can never do justice.

The second thought was people who say my bundle of joy has arrived are either lying or they would have had a C-Section. It is simply not possible to live through so much pain and love that little one. Its just a bundle. And I was crazy enough to make a baby.

Monday, 18th Dec 2006 7:00 p.m. I'm taken in
The Doc is out after operating on the intestine lady. I'm walked into the operating room. Half my body is on a chair. Legs are propped up on two stands. Once in this position, the entire arrangement is elevated. I'm back to the permanent frog position. I can see myself in the overhead mirror.

Contraction sets in and I'm pushing hard. Doc says "I'm not close enough to get the baby out". Cynical Nurse suggests that they go downstairs and finish the consultations and then be back. Damn Cynical Nurse.

I plead with the Doc not to leave me and go.

I cry, "I can't bear the pain anymore."

"Please do a C-Section. I want to die. I can't take this anymore.", I plead with her.

She casts a disgusted look and leaves.

Monday, 18th Dec 2006 7:15 p.m. A new nurse
The Fat Mean Nurse Anu arrives and CNG hands over her shift to her with a quick rundown of the cases. Anu is initially patient encouraging looking attentively at me down there. Consciously avoiding the overhead mirror, I accidentally look at it between contractions while turning my head from one side to the other. Gynaec's job is not a pretty one to look at multiple v* through their careers patiently waiting for the head to come.

Monday, 18th Dec 2006 7:30 p.m. Quick Contractions
Quick contractions now. Contractions that were minutes part are now seconds apart. Anu is joined by 2 more nurses and they are all encouraging me to "strain".

"Push". "Push". "come on strain a little more. you are doing good."

The pain is gone.

At last, I've learnt what it meas to "strain" else I was going to ask for a Dictionary so that there is no communication gap :) I take a deep breath ad keep pushing hard. But it is not hard enough for the big head to come out. They can see the hair of the baby now.

In retrospect, I feel I could have done better if I had more emotional support if they had allowed mom to come in or if they allow husbands. I think hospitals in smaller towns in India should allow husbands to stay by the side of their wives during labor.

Monday, 18th Dec 2006 7:45 p.m. When will this stop?
I swear to kill anyone who talks about having a second baby. It can't get any worse than this. I have no energy to scream. Some wise person had once said, "Conserve your energy. Don't scream. Instead push." I did just that. Convinced this is as far as it could get, Anu ran downstairs to get the Doc.

Monday, 18th Dec 2006 7:55 p.m. A moment of relief
Doc comes in. By then I had taken a break and got my legs down. The nurses were wild that I was not in position. Legs and thighs were paining badly because of being in the frog position this long.

I feel my body is going to come apart and the baby is just going to cut through the muscles and fall out. So bad is the pain. Seeing the Doc, I was relieved but concerned too that she too might just ask me to keep pushing and I wondered for how long this see-sawing would go on.

Monday, 18th Dec 2006 8:10 p.m. A prick
The equipment is all ready. Doc puts on the gloves. Has everything ready. I'm avoiding looking at the overhead mirror. I feel a quick prick down there. And then a scissor/knife like thing that runs down the skin to make a opening big enough for the baby to come out. The injection might have been a local anaesthesia. I didn't feel the pain while she cut through.

Monday, 18th Dec 2006 8:13 p.m. Lil General arrives
There is a pump like thing next to me. She picks it and pumps in through my opening. I can feel the baby coming out. The head and then it gets worse for a few seconds as the body slithers out. Lil General is born. I'm surprised this part was so quick and easy. I see the Doc lifting the baby by its head in a forecep like thing and handing it over to the nurse. They timed his birth at 8:13 p.m.

I don't feel the umbilical cord being cut. The first thing I notice in the baby as he is being handed over is his ASSET dangling.

Delivered through vacuum, Lil General was a boy. A healthy 3.2 Kg baby.

Monday, 18th Dec 2006 9:00 p.m. Post delivery pain is worse than contraction
From 8:15 p.m. until 9:00 p.m. I was being stitched. The Doc said later she was worried about my excessive bleeding. I cried and cried in pain through the stitching process. This pain was worse than the labor pain. Every inch of my body ached. To flush out the residual blood in the body, the Doc would insert something called a "kidney pack" which was like a hard pouch through a hole of probably 1 inch width down there and get it out forcibly...it would push all the blood out. She did this about 5 times. I glanced at the overhead mirror and all I saw was blood, blood and blood..all over. Like a scene out of some exorcist movie...

I'm given drips to control the bleeding. The Doc leaves. I'm alone.

Monday, 18th Dec 2006 9:15 p.m. I want to see Mom
I tell Anu I want to see Mom. My request is denied.

Monday, 18th Dec 2006 9:30 p.m. I want to see Mom
I plead with Anu to see Mom. I cry on seeing Mom. After a few minutes I ask Mom what baby it was. Anu was shocked. She said I'm probably the first patient in her career who has asked an hour after the baby's birth about the baby.

Monday, 18th Dec 2006 10:15 p.m. I'm in pain.

"Please give me some painkiller.", I plead with Anu.

"This is no pain. you got to bear it.", says Anu.

"How many kids do you have?" I ask casually.

None came the reply.

"No kids, no opinion." I retorted, feeling sorry about having said that later.

Monday, 18th Dec 2006 11:30 p.m. I go to the room. End of a long day.
After washing me up ad inducing drips again, I'm walked to the room. After 5 steps I can see the path ahead diminishing anf my head spinning. Suddenly it is all dark and I pass out on the way. I'm helped onto my feet again and make it thr a few feet to the room and crash on the bed. The night is a blur. I wake up every hour to see the time and calculate how long it would be before Vivek gets there. It was the end of a long day.

Lil General, welcome to the family. You are a bundle of joy.

A Labor Story contd... - Part 2

The content for this post has been swimming in my head for weeks now. Reminiscing those hours leading to the birth of the Lil General here in full detail will make for a grouse reading, so be forewarned and use your discretion.

Monday, 18th December 2006, 12:30 p.m.
I have been pacing up and down the room while the rest of the family is reading my face, talking to hospital staff, taking phone calls and settling down.

Monday, 18th December 2006, 1:00 p.m. Pain Intensifies
Composed Nurse Geetha (Lets calls her CNG) comes in with the doppler. Checks BP and the baby's heartbeat.
She asks, "How far apart are the pains?" I've no idea. She promises to be back by 1:30 p.m. I keep pacing the floor. God, I think whose idea was it to make a baby.

Monday, 18th December 2006, 1:30 p.m. Enema time - the best way to clear your tummy
Am so relieved to see CNG. Everyone is asked to step out of the room while she asks me to lie down and pumps something like soap water inside me. Minutes later I rush to the toilet and can feel my system clearing out. My my...there was so much inside. Having lunch was such a waste of time.

CNG promises to be back by 2:00 p.m.

Continue reading A Labor Story


Monday, 18th December 2006, 2:00 p.m. Clock is ticking
No sign of CNG yet. Mom is wondering when they are going to take me inside as I'm in pain. I'm not talking..only the decibel level of my moaning has been on the rise.

Monday, 18th December 2006, 2:30 p.m. Yo..CNG is here.
CNG asks me how I'm feeling. I wasn't sure what to answer that would make her take me into the operating room. So I stay quiet and let my face and sounds do the talking.

She times the gap between the pains. I tell her it has been paining once every 5 mins. Not convinced, she decides it is actually 10 mins apart.

Leaves. Promises to be back at 3:00 p.m.

Monday, 18th December 2006, 3:00 p.m.
No one yet. Anonymous nurse peeks in and leaves. I am wailing in pain. Mom is sitting by my side helpless.

Monday, 18th December 2006, 3:30 p.m. Time to go in
CNG times the pains. It is 5 mins apart. Time to go in. I cast a 'bye' look at mom and go in, with no idea of what to expect. Mom walks me until the operating area which is about 20 feet away from our room.

Monday, 18th December 2006, 3:35 p.m. Not the real operating room. More waiting in order.
It is a huge room with many cots. The decor is not pleasing. Dull white walls. There is a big white board that has the names of the patients to be operated that evening.

All the beds are empty. There are a few operating rooms at one end of the room. At the far end is a stack of medicines and probably a toilet.

I'm helped out of my dress into the hospital gown - a dull grey one - the kind you see in TV. One anonymous nurse plaits my hair and ties it up with a white thread - good fashion sense :). They clean me up. While one nurse is doing that, the other is looking and a third is chatting. I expect the action to start soon, but nothing happens.

The anonymous nurses are now joined by some janitors and they all gossip about the Doc, how busy the hospital is today - the no. of out patients attended to by Doc already up at 54. That there is a steady flow of people down at the lounge and people are getting impatient/wild..some having come at 11:00 a.m. haven't yet met the Doc.

Monday, 18th December 2006, 4:00 p.m. - Pain subsides
Pain has subsided over the past 10 mins and I momentarily slip into dreamland. This sinful act is caught my CNG.

CNG shakes me, "What happened to your pains?"

I reply, "Oh, its there." I'm worried they might not get the baby out and fake the pain. But you know what, you can't fake real labor pain. Doppler and BP checks happen every 30 mins.

The anonymous nurses are still gossipping.

Monday, 18th December 2006, 4:10 p.m. - Pain intensifies. Position taught. That magical word "Strain".
Pain is back and so is my moaning.

CNG teaches me to "strain" during pain by getting my legs up like a frog and "strain" myself as if I'm constipated. She asks me to keep trying when there is pain.

Monday, 18th December 2006, 4:15 p.m. - I have company
Pain hasn't subsided. A lady is admitted next to me. Her caesarean is scheduled for 4:50 p.m. that evening. She is cleaned. She is not in pain and is sleeping peacefully. How lucky I think to myself.

Monday, 18th December 2006, 4:45 p.m. - Imperfect timing. I am reprimanded
The anaesthetist is here for the Caesarean lady (Sudha, I got to know her later). Action begins in the room. Sudha is taken in for the operation - turns out she wanted her baby out before 5:30 p.m. - some auspicious timing funda.

CNG - the experienced nurses of all, goes for the operation. I'm left under the supervision of the anonymous ones. A few minutes later the janitor takes over. I know I know ...She reprimands me for not "straining" and getting my legs up only after the pain has subsided. Poor timing ...I need to give birth to many babies to perfect this timing.

The mean janitor says, "At this rate you will only deliver by midnight. Do you want us to go home or not?"

I think, "Thank you for being so nice."

I'm alone again. In pain. I tell the anonymous nurse that I want to go to the bathroom. She helps me get up and walks me there but doesn't leave me. There is no privacy when you are in labor.

Monday, 18th December 2006, 5:15 p.m. - Yo! The Doc is here. Water breaks.
The Doc is out of the operating room after the Caesarean is done. That was fast I think. Meanwhile, the gossip has been on about the commotion in the lounge downstairs and the incessant wait. The joke is "Some people are making dinner plans at the lounge."

My pain has aggravated and so restless that I'm tossing and turning. Whenever I see people around I try the frog thing as though someone reminded me.

Doc tells me, "I'm proud of you. You have been patient and bearing the pain without making too much noise. I got to examine you."

Oh no, not again. The fist goes inside. Seconds later I'm lying in a pool of water. Now, I know what water breaking is all about.

My bed is cleaned up. Doc scolds CNG for being so careless all this while as the pain inducing tablet had not taken effect. She instructs her to induce me.

..to be contd...

A Labor Story : The story of how LG was born - Part 1

The content for this post has been swimming in my head for weeks now. Reminiscing those hours leading to the birth of the Lil General here in full detail will make for a grouse reading, so be forewarned and use your discretion.

Sunday, 17th December 2006, 10:30 a.m.: Everything is normal

A bright sunny Sunday morning. It's beautiful outside and I tell myself not today. We are watching the NDTV Profit's Real Estate show. Phone rings. Guests to be expected in a row that afternoon.

Sunday, 12:00 p.m. : Still doing great

First set of guests arrive. We entertain them for an hour. I get restless as lunch is delayed. I excuse myself and have lunch.

Sunday, 4:00 p.m. : Aaah, nothing yet!

Wake up after a nap. Guests came, left. Every guest has a opinion of when I'm going to deliver.
The next bunch of people are chatting away with mom while Pravin attempts to lighten up my mood by getting me to play a game of Chinese Checkers. Wondering if we are not old enough for that. Yes, we are but WHO CARES. Once a champ, I was quite rusty that afternoon and lost a couple of games before gaining ground. We followed it with a game of scrabble wherein Pravin CHEATED and WON.

Sunday, 6:00 p.m. : The day just gets busier by the hour! Ummm Chocolates...delicious

Continue reading A Labor Story


Guests leave. Attending to guests all through the day takes a toll on mom.
Intercom rings. Pravin's delayed baggage arrives from Air France. We are busy unpacking stuff for the next hour and the house is strewn with all the goodies. While mom and Pravin are busy arranging stuff, I keep aside all the chocolates. When you are pregnant, all that you care about is FOOD. Mom's famous words "Eat all you want now. For three months after delivery, there will be a lot of restrictions on your diet." resonate in my ears. I take full advavtage of that and mouth a handful of chocolates. Sinful!

Sunday, 7:15 p.m. : Thighs ache. Finding it difficult to walk.

Exhausted. Too tired to move. The house is still in a mess. I announce my thighs are aching. Mom STOPS what she is doing. There's a tension in her eyes worried if this might be that fateful NIGHT. Nights are scary and if you have a pregnant girl at home, it gets all the more creepy. Mom calls the cooking aunty asking her to come and sleep in for the night.

Mom tells me to hold in until tomorrow whe she will get back to the pink of her health ad all energetic and stuff. I assure her that I will pass on the message to Lil General. You see he is in cotrol of the situation.

And then she is quick to list a set of instructions to me : no using the Indian toilet, no standing / sitting for long etc etc.

Sunday, 8:15 p.m. : What a bummer! The pain is gone....

I feel better. The pain is gone. I call the cooking aunty and ask her not to come. Mom is not convinced. She feels I'm close, very close to the D-day. We chat with dad. I feel exhuasted and crash in the drawing room after dinner.

Sunday, 11:30 p.m.
Sleep evades me. I can't find a comfortable position to lie down. I am mindlessly browsing orkut and chat with Vivek until midnight.

Monday, 12:30 a.m. : Undertaker Rules
I throw up. Meantime, Pravin is watching WWE and WCW on TV. I join him and seeing Undertaker smash people churns my stomach. I tell myself, "Labor pain can't be worse than this. Here's a guy with his arms beaten up by a steel chair and god knows how many fractures and blood oozing all over the ring."

Monday, 1:30 a.m.
With 4 pillows propped up, I decide to rest my bones.

Monday, 7:30 a.m. : When you're not working, there are no Monday Blues
Despite the lack of good sleep, I feel fresh and the spirit is high. 4 more days for Vivek to come. I tell Lil General, "Hold in until then. Pa will be here and then you can come out. There's no hurry but better BEHAVE YOURSELF until then."

Monday, 7:50 a.m.
Convincing Mom I need to go for a walk, I join Pravin and we walk to the hospital and get an appointment for that morning.

Monday, 10:30 a.m. : My weekly dream destination -- At the hospital lounge
No pains. I'm all good. Mom and I leave for the hospital. Its a long wait as usual. India makes a LOT of babies. To be No. 2 populous nation means a lot of work and the nursing homes here are a evidence to that fact. If you are a gynaec and in India, you can never be without a job for a zillion years.

Monday, 11:15 a.m. : The fateful meeting with the Doc
We meet the doc. She examines and is happy with the baby. The doppler goes "Dhak. Dhak. Dhak." Lg's heartbeat is racing as usual.

Monday, 11:17 a.m. : FIST of Doc is bigger than the baby
I tell the Doc that movements have reduced considerably. In retrospect, I REGRET having said that. She gives me a second look and explains that she has to examine me INSIDE which in simple terms means she is going to get that fist of hers inside. A full grow fist inside a teeny weeny hole...the very thought scares me.

Monday, 11:19 a.m. : Being born a woman SUCKS sometimes
I scream in pain. I am requested to cooperate. I feel like passing out.

Monday, 11:20 a.m. : All set for the wrestling mania to start says the doc
She is done and tells me that the cervix has opened, dilated and ready to deliver by that night and asks me to get admitted within an hour. She keeps a pain inducing tablet inside that would soon trigger natural delivery pains. The pain is so intense that words don't register in my head.

Monday, 11:25 a.m.
She explains all this to mom. Mom is still taking in all that the Doc just said. Its hard to believe when the moment is upon you. For months, for days we had been bracing ourselves for this day but still when it is finally there you don't know how to react. Mom asked twice if it was going to be today. Doc says, "By this evening in all likelihood. Your admission card and a room will be ready. Get packed, have lunch and be back in an hour."

Monday, 11:27 a.m. : Doc's motivating talk
Before we leave the Doc's cabin, I pose a naive question, "Will it pain?". "Ofcourse, it will. I have the patience to go thr a normal delivery if you have the patience. Even Queen Victoria sustained this pain to deliver her kids. No pain, no children." came the response. Very comforting words. We make an exit.

Monday, 11:40 a.m. : I call Vivek
I regain my composure and outside the hospital, I look at my watch, do a quick calculation of the flights available that afternoon for Vivek. Realising he doesn't have much time, I call him from the auto and brief him. He starts off on his travel plans.

Monday, 11:45 a.m. : We are home.
Back home, we tell Pravin to get started. He takes out the magic paper that has all the phone numbers listed for this very emergency. Fingers tapping away quickly on the Landline, mobile phones. Close family called who need to get to the hospital to help out mom. From that day on until 15 days later, the phones do't stop ringing.

Monday, 11:47 a.m. : We're packed.
All the already packed bags are brought out. I have lunch, the fastest I have ever had. Pravin and mom are so tensed they refuse to eat. I'm all smiles now..no pain and I'm in high spirits. The day is here. The tummy load will be off but I'm a little sad that Vivek won't be there anytime soon.
Mom is very tensed but doesn't show it. Dad and Vivek have already called many times.

Monday, 11:55 a.m. : In Hindu Religion, there's a ritual for every event in life.
The neighbour granny inserts neem leaves in my stomach praying for a safe and easy delivery. Jewels are not allowed in the hospital during operation so mom tries in vain to take the last 2 bangles off my head. It doesn't come off and I bleed on the wrist...so we give up.

Mom had meticulously planned for this day. Like programmed robots we knew what to do and get started within 15 minutes. No..we hadn't done dress rehearsals :)

We are waiting for the clock to strike 12...for 10:30 - 12:00 oon on Monday's is considered inauspicious. Pain is slowly setting in.

Monday, 12:00 p.m. : The clock strikes twelve.
Mom, Pravin, our neighbour and I leave for the hospital.

Monday, 12:05 p.m. : The show begins...
The admission card is ready. It is a very busy day at the hospital as the Doc was away on a vacation for 5 days. The lounge is teeming with patients. As I wait a few minutes at the lounge before heading upstairs, people cast a quizzical look at my tummy and the discomfiture written all over my face.

Monday, 12:10 p.m.
I climb the stairs leading to the first floor where we are greeted by the Cynical Nurse. We are told the "Super Deluxe" room equipped with a visitors lounge, TV and a/c is not available. So we would have to settle in for the Deluxe version. Obviously, there is no choice and we take that with a request that we be shifted once the other one is ready.
The pain is increasing..what pain and where I'm not too sure. There is a pain and it is growing exponentially. The nurse - a composed one called Geetha is summoned. She examines and says it is not the REAL pain yet. Damn pain. Pain is a pain.

..to be contd..

I'm in pain

Updated on 8th Jan '07: I started drafting this post on 18th Dec 06 minutes before leaving for the hospital but never got to publishing it..here it is now! More posts to follow on Lil General!

Pravin is here and it is a beautiful Monday morning. We went for a refreshing walk to the hospital (alrighty I know what you're thinking but that's the only place I am allowed to go or have been going for the past 2 months) to get an appointment for our regular consultation later this morning. Just as our other visits, after a good 30 minute wait at the lounge, mom and I met the Doctor and we were relieved to know everything was normal Lil General still feels cozy inside. And then I casually remarked to the Doctor that movements had considerably decreased since the previous night. Thats when trouble started.

She examined me and believe me there are still times when I think that this part was more painful than the actual delivery. I braced for the worst and she said "Get admitted today. You will deliver by this night." she gave a pain inducing tablet and a window of 1 hr to have lunch, pack up from home and get admitted.

The feeling cannot be described in words. All these months I was struggling to take one day at a time coping with indigestion and itchy backs. Now all that seemed trivial and the fear of delivery overpowered me. The doctor was quick to remark, "I have the patience to go through a normal delivery for you if you have the patience. And I'm not going to undermine delivery pain. Yes, It will pain like hell that you have never experienced before. But thats what you got to bear to get the kid." You're thinking if the motivating speech helped ? :) Oh yea I wasn't still thinking what lay ahead as pain slowly began to set in...

Meanwhile, mom was still taking in what the Doc said finding it hard to believe that the D-Day was finally here. After we got out, our fingers tirelessly dialed numbers and 3 phones seemed like less. Tickets had to be booked, trips planned and logistics worked out. This was the moment we had carefully planned for but no planning is good enough. Got home and had lunch - the fastest I have had - in 10 mins. We were all set to leave for the hospital in 20 mins. Pain slowly began to set in and I told my neighbour granny with a smile - I think I'm in pain. I know now what she meant then, "if you are in pain, you can't say it. Atleast not with a smile."